


I don't need any more "what if"s

by imissmaeberry



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, Graduation, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Pining, Sort of anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-01-08
Packaged: 2018-09-15 17:23:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9247907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imissmaeberry/pseuds/imissmaeberry
Summary: The end of the school year is swiftly approaching - faster than even Satori could hope for, and he's beginning to panic. If he doesn't confess his feelings soon, then why even bother?





	

**Author's Note:**

> this was inspired by @thehauntedboy's ushiten day comic, which is [SO CUTE PLEASE READ IT](http://thehauntedboy.tumblr.com/post/155505058391)

No matter how many times he wrote and rewrote and scribbled out sentences, Satori found himself entirely unable to put his feelings into words on the paper in front of him.

This phrase was too formal, too stiff, that one too congenial, too buddy-buddy.

Satori didn’t want to be _buddies._ He and the object of his affection were already friends. The problem was that he wanted more, had wanted more for nearly all three years of their time shared in high school, and now that time was up. Volleyball was over and graduation was swiftly approaching.

Every day, once classes ended, Satori found himself seated at his desk, pen in hand, fresh sheet of paper laid out before him, and he tried to make the words come out how he wanted them. He could _barely_ get even a single sentence written before he was scratching out the whole page, writing swear words in the margins of the ruined page.

_Goddammit, miracle boy, what have you done to me?_

Satori was running out of time. Graduation was the following day, and it was _so_ late, and he was exhausted, and panic was running through him, coursing through his veins and making his heart pound double time.

_It’s not like he even feels the same way!_

_W_ _hat if this ruins our friendship?_

_I don’t want to leave high school without telling him_

_Maybe I’m better off not telling him_

_What the fuck **no** I decided I would _

_But maybe…_

Satori sighed, laid his head on the desk, then promptly picked it up and slapped himself on the forehead. “Fuck!” _It was never supposed to be this difficult._

He looked around at the boxes placed intermittently throughout his and Eita’s room, running a hand through his hair and taking a sip from the sports drink he’d picked up from the vending machine on his way back to the dorm. He mused for a moment or two on his options – suffer in silence as he had these last three years, always hook himself with what ifs, or to take the risk and put himself out there and show his heart and be vulnerable and scared.

Both of them fucking terrified him.

He crumpled up a few more of his rejects before laying out one more piece of paper. _If I can’t do it this time, I’m not going to do it. Simple as that._

He fell asleep at his desk before he could even finish trying.

Satori didn’t hear the creak of his and Eita’s door opening, didn’t see his roommate come and wander over to Satori’s desk, looking over his shoulder at the paper on his desk. Eyes scanning over the few sentences, Eita picked the paper up slowly so as to disturb his sleeping friend, folded it up, and made his way back out of the still-open door.

* * *

 

When Wakatoshi woke up, eyes cracking open naturally as the sun rose, one of the first things he noticed was the folded-up slip of paper laying on his floor, looking as though someone had shoved it underneath his door as he slept. He removed himself from his sheets and walked over to the doorway to pick it up, unfold it and read its contents.

The first thing he noticed was the familiar handwriting – engrained in his memory from three years of passed notes that he had refused to respond to (and secretly kept to read over later).

The second thing he noticed was the note was unsigned, and unfinished. But it said enough.

Wakatoshi placed the note on his desk and left to take his run before the rest of the day began.

Runs, although very much a physical aspect of his daily routine, had become much more over time. It cleared his mind and soothed his heart more often than not – something Wakatoshi needed desperately at the moment.

When he returned to the dorms he passed by Eita leaving the shower, who nodded at Wakatoshi and gave him a knowing look. The ace was unsure what the look could have meant, but brushed it off as he in turn headed into the floor’s facilities.

The late morning was the third years’ graduation ceremony – a moment they’d been pining after for so long now that had suddenly arrived with an illusionary quickness.

But Wakatoshi was preoccupied with thoughts of what he will do after the ceremony. Not thoughts of college and career, like his peers, no. That had been cemented months ago, inter-high results be damned. He was thinking of this that would affect his life almost instantaneously.

* * *

 

When Satori woke up on the morning of graduation, his first thoughts were of being completely and totally out of time. He went through his usual morning motions – shower, drying and styling his hair, dressing and teasing Eita about _his_ hair, but even Eita could tell Satori’s mind was somewhere else entirely.

They made their way down to the ceremony and pretended to listen to the principal’s speech (which was recycled, he gave the same speech every year), and then the class president’s speech, and then they were brought onto the stage and given their diplomas, and suddenly high school was over.

Satori made his way out of the auditorium, quickly before anyone could catch him and follow, and started walking around campus. He was looking for a place to be by himself with his thoughts. He settled on a bench beneath a cherry blossom tree, sitting with his head in his hands, arms balanced on his knees.  

Satori’s focus goes in and out and he didn’t know how long he’d been sitting on the bench when he heard the footsteps approaching him. His eyes were focused on the bit of pavement between his feet when the footsteps stopped in front of him – Satori looked up, only to see the causation of his sleepless nights and inability to translate the thrumming of his heart into words. He plastered a bright smile onto his face, desperate not to show any weakness.

Wakatoshi stood before Satori, unsure of what to say or do. His hands fumbled over each other and his eyes were unable to look at one single spot – at least, until Satori smiled up at him and brought everything into focus.

Satori placed his hands together, fingertip to fingertip, eyes closed as he spoke. “Wakatoshi! So what can I d-o fo-“ Satori cut himself off at the sound of ripped stitching, eyes blown wide in surprise.

He hadn’t seen the way Wakatoshi’s fingers fumbled over each other in his indecision.

Cradled in his hands, Wakatoshi was holding the second button from his uniform jacket, and his cheeks were flushed. Satori simply stared up at him, words failing him once more. Wakatoshi forced himself to look away as he found his voice, blush spreading as he spoke. “Satori, I-I believe…this is the traditional way to…respond to – “

Satori was off the bench in seconds, leaping from his seat and throwing his arms around Wakatoshi’s neck. Though surprised, Wakatoshi responded immediately, wrapping his arms around Satori’s shoulders. No words were exchanged – they didn’t need them. The two of them simply looked into each other’s eyes and it was enough.

The two reached for each other simultaneously, lips slotting together as if they’d done it multiple times before. Satori’s mind finally found peace – no what ifs, no risks or vulnerability.

Later, when Satori admitted to having tried to write a confession note before giving up, Wakatoshi asked if he could have them. Blushing, Satori agreed and handed over the crumpled papers, not before calling his boyfriend a “sappy romantic, who knew, Wakkun.”

**Author's Note:**

> hello all I hope you liked it??? come talk 2 me on tumblr?? @aonechan?? or @starryiedd on twitter


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